According to Ugandan social etiquette, I should not be surprised to see two men holding hands as a sign of friendship. However, public displays of affection are frowned upon. I know right from the start that this will be a challenge for me.
Gary Chapman wrote a book called The 5 Love Languages in which he describes the many ways by which people feel loved. Love can be expressed through words of affirmation, giving gifts, acts of service, spending quality time, and physical touch. While I have been spoiled in all five areas, physical touch is my primary love language. Yes, I am a hugger.
Chapman aptly describes physical touch by saying, “This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.”
The point, though, is to express love in the way the other person most appreciates/needs it. Of course I can’t know just by looking at someone what makes them feel loved, particularly if they’re from another culture. So, in Uganda, expressing my love and appreciation in the form of a hug for the many helps the villagers provide must be curtailed. I look forward to learning how Ugandans express care and appreciation toward one another.
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