Reflections on Mission Trip #1 and My Second Year Purpose

The trip contributed to my overall understanding of how short-term missions works (at least some of them), my expectations related to impact, and My Second Year mission purpose. How did I break down walls, build compassion, and show grace?

Breaking down my own walls came when living in one house with 65 people where revealing my heart was met with warmth rather than rejection or judgment. I was so pleasantly surprised by this realization, but you know how God can be. Breaking down my own walls came when I mustered the courage to talk socially with the seniors and the children. This may seem an odd thing but I would much rather listen and observe someone else talking socially than be the initiator. I think I did pretty well. Breaking down my own walls came when Brenda learned about my story and just came to me and hugged me. Something about her sincerity and her compassion just melted my heart. Breaking down walls for others may have come when I practiced listening and drawing them to talk more about their stories. I have to admit that I was afraid to ask the Natives about their stories given the high rate of incest and suicide. I was afraid I would not be well equipped to respond effectively. Ugh…God, I need more courage to be your ambassador.

Building compassion occurred when several mission people shared their stories and I was able to listen and pray for each one of those who opened themselves up. We really shared some wonderful moments together. Building compassion occurred when I found myself forming assumptions about things people would reveal and I stopped myself. Instead I asked questions to learn more rather than to close off the opportunity to show interest or concern.

Showing grace, well…I have to admit I probably received more grace than any of these others actually needed from me. I often found myself thinking about how I’d organize the mission experience differently and then quickly reminded myself that I don’t know enough about the details to make such an assessment. I allowed myself to be flexible and to go with the flow by meeting Brenda’s needs and expectations. I’m sure this has little to do with grace but maybe the practice in flexibility counts for something.

Overall, it seems My Second Year purpose was fulfilled to varying degrees and in varying ways. But the purpose was mostly fulfilled in relation to the mission people rather than the Nome locals. I’m not feeling like I’ve done well in extending myself out into the community in the way I hoped/expected. I do know that I have high expectations but I also don’t want to make excuses or give myself a pass where one isn’t due. I did learn a lot, I helped a lot, and I made some great friends. I’ll keep practicing.