Through the wisdom of many friends and authors, I quickly learned that the work of grief was to be completed with intent. Therefore, my first year after Rick’s death was marked by that work. I wrote a story not about the beginning of our lives together, but instead about the ways I recognized the many firsts without Rick and the sweet remembering of our many lasts. I wrote the story of my grief journey, a journey that I would later understand to have been designed especially for me. Truly it’s a story of God’s amazing grace.
As I chronicled the many milestones – holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, traditions – throughout the first year, the writing gave me the opportunity to look back and to look ahead. These milestones were part of the before and were very easily identifiable. As such, I could see what the future would hold – which specific milestones were ahead – at least as it related to that first year. I can joyously look back and say that I had a wonderful year of fully experiencing the grief journey which transformed into something beautiful…healing. Such wonderful memories were captured in that writing and in the many other expressions of grief/healing throughout that year. I know a certain sense of grief will be with me always but I came to a place where I could step out of that shadow and into something wonderful.
He promised his mercies and compassion would be new every day (Lamentations 3:22-23).
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